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Health & Fitness

Getting Your Special Learner Ready for Back to School

Most kids, if not parents, experience some level of anxiety at the beginning of a new school year; however, for children with physical, neurological, learning and/or emotional disabilities, that anxiety is usually based on some very real experiences and fears. So, as parents of children with disabilities, what can we do to help our kids form a positive and successful start to a new year?

 

Is your child entering a new school this Fall?

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•      Contact guidance a few weeks before school starts to request a class list(s) and to schedule a walk through of your child’s school just prior to the first day of school. For many children anxious about a new school, getting to meet the teacher(s), even very briefly, before that first day, can go a very long way in calming their jitters. If that’s not possible, getting familiar with the school will also be of tremendous benefit. Visit your child’s locker, and make sure to locate some of the building highlights: main office, gymnasium, cafeteria, media center, and yes…the bathrooms closest to their classroom.  

•      If you are new to town, request recommendations from the school of families you could contact for play dates. If your student shows up on day one knowing at least one or two friendly faces, that can make a world of difference.

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•      Encourage your child to join an activity early on in the school year: school newspaper, gaming club, sport, or band. This will allow them to connect quickly with other students that share similar interests.

Preparing for a successful year

·      It’s a good idea to meet with teachers toward the beginning of the year. Give your child and teacher some time to get to know each other, and schedule one-on-one after school meetings with her teacher(s) towards the end of September, or beginning of October. Make sure to start the meeting(s) highlighting the positive feelings your child has toward the teacher, as well as what they are doing in the classroom that is working well for your student. Also make sure to bring along a copy of your child’s IEP or 504 plan, on which you’ve highlighted the important information and accommodations. Always remember the teacher wants your child to learn and succeed as well.

·      Once each month, email your child’s teacher to check-in on her progress, or share any concerns you may have. Don’t leave important information, or pressing concerns until conference time. Teacher’s appreciate the feedback from parents, and can benefit from knowing what’s going on with their students. This extends to non-academic issues as well. If there are emotional issues happening at home (the loss of a pet, the distraction of an incident), it might benefit your child to clue the teacher in on what’s going on.

·      At any age, if you help your child with their homework, please make sure to make a note at the bottom of the homework indicating that you assisted—not for minor issues, but if you have provided major help. This lets the teacher know where your student may have missed content, or may be having difficulties. Please remember that the goal of homework is not to complete it 100% accurately, but for your child to reinforce and apply concepts learned during the day. Homework is also an important tool for teachers assessing their success in teaching their students. If your child is confused and needs your help, that is okay…but the teacher needs to know where the confusion is so that they have a chance to revisit the material with your child.

·      On a related note: don’t be afraid to have your children stop any particular homework assignment for the night. If your child simply doesn’t understand a concept, or has spent more than a reasonable amount of time on a subject, continuing with it unsuccessfully can lead to excessive frustration and anxiety. If you see this happening—especially repeatedly, stop your child and write a note, or drop an email to the teacher. They may need to revisit the topic one-on-one after school, or address what’s going on to develop a more beneficial plan for your student.

·      Perhaps the one, most important thing you can do for your child is to organize a quiet place and time, along with a regular routine, for homework! This may seem trivial or impossible, but it is the most important thing you can do for a student’s success and confidence. The quiet spot can be in a quiet kitchen, or the corner of a bedroom, or the living room, den or office, but it needs to be a spot used regularly. It should be free of distractions such as televisions, phones, or games, and for older children, it should have tools such as calculators and dictionaries nearby. The second part of a successful regiment is the “routine.” Try to have a consistent policy regarding homework: Is it completed immediately after school, or after a snack? If your child is involved in sports after school, does the house schedule quiet, homework time before or after dinner? If friends are coming home after school, is there 30 minutes set aside for everyone to begin homework before the play date begins? If there is a set pattern/routine that is expected by both parent and child, enforcing it should alleviate fights over homework, and increase the benefit from it.

 

Preventing anxiety from unstructured time

Ask any parent of a school-age kid, and they will tell you that the majority of problems don’t happen in class, but during the unstructured times: on the bus, at lunch or recess, or in the hallways. Help your student succeed with a few techniques:

BUS: Introducing your child to the bus can be difficult, especially if a problem occurs on the way to school. Sometimes the more successful technique to the old “sink or swim” philosophy is successive approximations: try driving your child to school and having them take the bus home. Perhaps you could try the reverse if his or her anxiety is based at the end of the day. Making sure that your child is off to a secure start in the morning, or is not worried about getting home, is crucial to an anxiety-free day. Once this type of routine is mastered, and if the goal is getting them on the bus both ways, then you can begin to gradually add days of the week, building upon each success.

LUNCHTIME: To give your child moral support, place a note in their lunch bag. For conversation starters at the elementary level, you can write a joke or interesting animal fact that they can share with the kids at the table. To boost middle or high school dialogue, place a newspaper clipping of a current event or sports’ topic in your child’s lunch or backpack.

RECESS:  Anxiety can grow if your child doesn’t fit in to the typical kickball or tag game at recess.  Typically, this problem takes a little more work on both the parent and teacher’s end.  Observation is the key to success.  Request that your child be observed on the playground for at least a week.  Meet with the teacher and come up with strategies, friend suggestions, or games that haven’t been suggested.  Children with social anxiety tend to walk the perimeter of the playground not knowing how to break in to social circles. If this is the case for your child, purchase two pedometers (one for your child and one to share with a friend).  Have your child calculate the distance they walked during recess. Pedometers are a great conversation starter!

LOCKERS: Locker combinations can be difficult to learn, so make sure that your child practices over the summer. If the locks aren’t built in to the lockers, request a lock from the school to bring home ahead of time to practice with. Even with practice, some children still struggle with lockers, so make sure you request the first or last locker in a row nearest the teacher’s classroom. This will help them spot their locker quickly, and have the resource of being close to a teacher’s room should they need additional help.

 

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Because every child, family and situation is unique, we at Hope Education Advocacy tailor our services according to your specific needs.  Our goal is to empower you, the parent, to become the best advocate for your child.

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If you need help navigating the public school system in providing support for your student with special needs, please contact us to see if we can help.

 

Alanna Shone & Stacey Griffin

HOPE Education Advocacy

Helping Parents Empower Themselves

 (781) 670-3383

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